12 Most Uproariously Funny Tweets
Unreasonable bosses, teenage kids, rush hour traffic, mortgages… there’s so much stress in our lives that we end up taking everything way too seriously. We often forget the power of laughter to make those daily stresses, well, a bit less stressful.
Social channels like Twitter amplify what we’re doing, how we feel, what we think. Some — especially us marketers and business professionals — tweet to prove how smart we are to build Klout scores, which is sometimes useful but frequently boring. I often imagine a few out there sitting in front of their computers with squinted eyes, tight shoulders and grimaced faces trying to crank out an insightful tweet.
Thankfully there are still a few who remember to not take themselves or this channel too seriously and help us release some of our daily tension with a good belly-laugh. To them I say “Thank You” by highlighting the 12 Most Uproariously Funny Tweets I’ve seen recently.
1. From @Peglegington
You have to be concise on Twitter. Like a circumcision, everything extra gets cut off whether you like it or not.
2. From @DONTJIMMYMEJULZ
My masseuse just read ‘Cinderella’ to me ~ That’s the last time I ask for a happy ending.
3. From @Burgee66
Today my 6 yr. old nephew asked me what “gay” meant. It wouldn’t have bothered me so bad, but it was right after he saw me throw a baseball.
4. From @sucittaM
Why would you pay $80 for a bra at Victoria’s Secret when I will hold your boobs up all day for half that?!
5. From @toddlevin
At a cemetery, looking for my name on tombstones. This must be the Goth version of Googling yourself.
6. From @almightygod
To most Christians, the Bible is like a software license. Nobody actually reads it. They just scroll to the bottom and click “I agree”.
7. From @sween
The hardest part of making a turducken is the look on the turkey’s face as he watches you make the duck eat the chicken.
8. From @EllieM72
I wonder if Buzz and Woody ever met any of Andy’s mom’s toys… especially since they probably have the same names.
9. From @YourFavWhiteGuy
Just saw a redhead drinking Ginger Ale. It looks to be making him stronger. We must stop him before it’s too late.
10. From @IamEnidColeslaw
Ripping a blaring fart every now and then lets your masseuse know who’s in charge.
11. From @sween
The best thing about marriage is getting to pretend all my jokes about not having sex are actually jokes.
12. From @jackwpayne
Politicians and diapers have 1 thing in common; they should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
Making people laugh on Twitter is no easy task. You only have 140 characters to build the setup & deliver a punch line, so you’d think it would be the professional comedian’s tweets included in this list. However, it’s the real-life reactions and observations from everyday people that seem to keep me in stitches and so I actively seek them out when I need break.
So do yourself and your followers a favor: lighten up… and then tweet.
Deaf people have no idea why the rest of us think farts are funny.
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